my fave song at the moment

http://www.microsoft.com/Windows/Downloads/Contents/Products/MediaPlayer/">
music video code by urbnmix.net
dandy warhols - we used to be friends

hmph... stop complaining bitch!

***my dog's sick. again. =( =( =( he got an infection from fighting with the other dogs in the neighborhood... it's kinda disappointing just coz i feel like my money's going to vet checkups and food and stuff. i mean, i was really looking forward to watching "the island" with a friend and i had to stay home to take care of my doggie... i don't want to complain, but i can't help it. yes, i'm selfish that way... but if you guys only knew what i go through everyday, you'd understand... it's not just my professional life, it's the personal and everything else... i feel like i'm tired all the time, even when i got a good night's rest. i constantly worry about things and my mind is like mush now from all the worrying and thinking i've been doing...

i'm careful of not putting ALL my thoughts into this thing, but sometimes i get tires of writing in my journal, and typing's faster!

...my dog's begging to be let out... but i know i can't under the vet's orders. his infection might worsen...

i have one more day left to "rest"... monday i go back to work... oh happy day.

nazi bitch

FUCK YOU, CITA BORROMEO GARCIA. KAKARMAHIN KA SA LAHAT NG MGA GINAWA MO, PUTANGINA MO!

life sucks. deal with it

maybe i forgot to include in my profile that i absolutely HATE mundane things and doing habitual, routinary stuff. there. i said it. actually, wrote it. but fuck! does this life suck or what? at least, mine does. i'm so jealous of my friends who're abroad, having the time of their lives. and i'm going out of my mind out here, trying to live on a (supposedly) call center salary (but honestly, wage workers, baka mas malaki pa kinikita nyo saken) supporting myself, some bills at the house and my dog. taking care of a dog is a huge thing, taking care of any animal is. when they get sick, you have to bring them to the vet and pray for the best; you have to bathe, feed them, make sure they have enough food and water to last them the few hrs you're not at home because the people in the house are just not animal lovers... and you can't even buy the things you WANT. just the stuff you NEED. oh! believe me. there's a giganormous difference between the two and don't even get me started on that! in the end, sometimes i just ask why am i even here??? it's all so dramatic, but i'm at that point right now, k? so stop bitchin'. let ME do that.

i'm just so fuckin' fed up with things that have been happening and i feel like i can't vent it fast enough! there're just too many thoughts inside my head right now that are bursting to be heard... or, in this case, written and read.

i never thought life would be this freakin' bad, ya know? it's just all too much to process, sometimes i just don't want to care anymore. but i'm human, so damn me to hell bcoz i can't help but friggin' care! i used to be such an optimist, but lately, i've just been so full of shitless thoughts, i'm spouting off curse words every second. even i'm dispppointed. i didn't have this kind of attitude before, dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! another question: how in da hell did that happen?

THE BEST FORWARDED EMAIL EVER... and my fave shows

i missed my fave shows lately bec of some cable shit...
i am gonna buy me a mean dvd player and watch one tree hill and 24 and the o.c. and buffy and roswell and veronica mars over and over and over again!

this week's been stressful as usual, but who doesnt have that right? esp. now, in this time of whateverness. fuck! what the fuck is happening to our country? well, i think one email forwarded to me recently can pretty much sum it up. i think every tax-paying, honest person and hardworking person out there should read it:

FW: WALANG KWENTANG PINASThe sentiments of the writer are so true... About themanner of expression, mejo violent but i respectit.... Many would ask, where is God amidst thesethings... my opinion - He is just waiting for us to let Him do things His way. Only in Him, we can find HOPE. God bless! :-)Kel

Galing sa isang ordinaryong manggawa sa Pilipinas Walang kwenta ang Pilipinas By: jawbreaker. (isang ordinaryong office worker naayaw na magbayad ng tax...ever!) Hindi ko na mapigilan ang sarili ko. Sukang-suka na kosa mga nangyayari sa bansang ‘to! Walang katapusang corruption, walang kamatayangpangbabatikos, pagbabatuhan ng tae atpagpapa-taasan ng ihi ng mga pulitiko sa bawat isa, walang tigil na imbestigasyon ng kung ano-anongisyu pero wala namang matinong resolusyon,walang puknat na pag-aagawan ng kapangyarihan sa pagitan ng mga partido, patuloy napagdami ng tamad at tangang Pilipino, patuloy napakikipaglaban ng ideolohiyang wala namang silbi. Ang gobyerno ng Pilipinas, talo pa ang septic tank nahinihigop ng Malabanan saksakan ng dumi at napakabaho. Kaya hindinakakapagtaka na ang Pilipinas ang isa sapinakamahirap at corrupt na bansa sa mundo. Kasi lahat sila bulok, lahat sila walang kwenta. Lahat silasugapa sa kapangyarihan at sa pera.

ANAK NG TETENG! !$#%Q!&!* @!!!!! KAHIT KRISTIYANO AKO, HINDI KO MAPIGILANG MAGMURA ATHILINGIN SA DIYOS (MINSAN NGA PATI SA DEMONYO) NAMAMATAY NA SILANG LAHAT AT I-BBQ SILA NG HABANG-BUHAY SA IMPIERNO. SINONG “SILA”? EH DI MGA CORRUPT NA GOVERNMENTOFFICIALS AND WORKERS, MGA TAMBAY NA PILIPINO NAANG LALAKI NG KATAWAN PERO HINDI NAMAN NAGTRATRABAHO AT HINDI NAGBABAYAD NG TAX, MGAMAYAYAMAN AT ARISTANG TAX EVADERS, PATI MGAAKTIBISTA, NPA AT IBA PANG IDEOLOGICAL GROUPS NA HINDI NAGBABAYAD NG TAX PERO PANG-GULO!!! MAMATAY NAKAYO!!! Lagi na lang sinasabi ng mga pulitiko: Ipaglaban angmasa! Tulungan ang masa! Mahalin ang masa! PUNYETA! MASA LANG BA ANG TAO SA PILIPINAS? SINO BA TALAGA ANG BUMUBUHAY SA PUNYETANG BANSANG TO? SAAN BA GALING ANG PANGPAGAWA NG MGA TULAY AT KALYE?SAAN BA GALING ANG PORK BARREL? SAAN BA GALING ANGPERANG KINUKURAKOT NYO? KAMI NA MGA MANGGAGAWA AT MIDDLE CLASS NA BAGO PAMAKUHA ANG SWELDO BAWAS NA KAMI ANG BUMUBUHAY SA WALANG KWENTANG BANSANA ‘TO!!!!!!!!! BAKIT YANG BANG MGA MASANG YAN NA LAGI NA LANG SENTRONG PLATAPORMA NG MGA PULITIKO EH NAGBABAYAD BA NGTAX???!!!! F**K YOU! KAHIT ISA SA MGA NAG-RA-RALLYING MGASQUATTER NA YAN, KAHIT SINGKO HINDI NAG-RE-REMITYAN SA BIR! PERO PINAPAKINGGAN BA KAMI NG GOBYERNO? LAGI NA LANG OPINYON NG MASA ANG INIINTINDI NGGOBYERNO. KUNG SINO ANG NAG-RA-RALLY, SA EDSA, SILA ANGNASUSUNOD. KUNG SINO ANG MAS MALAKAS SUMIGAW PERO WALA NAMANGECONOMIC CONTRIBUTION, SILA LAGI ANGFOCUS PAG MAY PROBLEMA. SILA LAGI ANG BIDA. KAMING MGA ORDINARYONG OFFICE WORKERS, OFW’S, LABORERSAT IBA PANG NAG-TRA-TRABAHO AT NAGBABAYAD NGTAX - KAMI ANG NAGPAPAKAHIRAP PARA BUHAYIN ANGPILIPINAS. KAMI ANG MGA TUNAY NA BAYANI NG BANSA!!!

Tuwing nakikita ko ang payslip ko, nag-iinit ang uloko at gusto kong maiyak sa inis. Napakalaki ngtax na binabawas sa akin pero ginagamit lang sawalang kwentang bagay ang perang pinaghirapan ko. Lahat ng pagtitipid ginagawa ko para suportahan angsarili ko, pamilya ko at ang punyetang bansang to.Ni hindi ako makabili ng chicken and spaghetti meal sa Jollibee kahit gutom na gutom na ko.Nag-tya-tyaga ako sa waffle na tig-P10, o kaya pagmay konting pera, junior bola-bola siopao saMini-Stop sa halangang P20. Eh kung yung pera ko na pinapangbabayad sa tax sa kinna lang napunta, eh di sana nakakapanood pa ko ngsine at least 2 beses sa isang buwan. Nakabili nasana ako ng bagong rubber shoes. Nakapagpagawa na sanaako ng sarili kong bahay. Yung tax na binabayad ko, karamihan nun derecho sabulsa ng mga corrupt na mga government officials atworkers. Habang hirap na hirap akong i-budgetang pera ko, sila naman nagpapakasarap sa mga mansyon.SUV’s at luxury cars pa ang dina-drive nila,samantalang ako sa pedicab lang sumasakay! P****** INA! PERA KO YANG PINAPAGPAPASASAAN NYO!!!!! Yung tax na binabayad ko, pinapangsuporta sa mgamahihirap. Saan ba galing ang pera pangpagawang housing at pagtulong sa mga mahihirap, di ba samga manggagawa na nagbabayad ng buwis! Pero karamihanng mahihirap, kung umasta kala mo inaapisila ng sobra. SA TOTOO LANG NO, KAYA ANG MGA MAHIHIRAP LALONG NAGHIHIRAP KASI MGA TAMAD! Ang daming mga tambay sa kalye na walang trabaho peroang laki ng katawan. Eh kung sila banagkargador sa pier eh di sana may pera sila. TAPOS WALA NA NGANG PERA, ANAK PA NG ANAK! PUNYETA! LALO NYO LANG PINAPADAMI ANG TAMAD AT TANGA SA MUNDO!!!!! Naaawa ako sa mga batang pakalat-kalat sa kalye atnamamalimos. Imbes na nag-aaral, dumadagdag langsila sa bilang ng mga future criminals sa Pinas.Hindi ako magtataka na yung batang nakita kongnamamalimos sa Cubao, pagkatapos ng ilang taoncellphone snatcher na. YUNG MGA MAGULANG NAMAN DYAN, COMMON SENSE LANG! HIRAP NA HIRAP NA NGA KAYO SA BUHAY, MANGDADAMAY PA KAYONG IBA?! PAPARAMIHAN NYO PA LAHI NYO! Palibhasa walang mga trabaho at walangpinagkaka-abalahan, kaya nagkakalabitan atnagsusundutan na lang maghapon, magdamag. Sa totoo lang, nakakabilib. Kasi kahit sa ilalim ng tulay osa kariton lang, nakakabuo pa rin ng bata! Ibigsabihin, maabilidad ang mga Pinoy. Kung gugustuhin, gagawan ng paraan. Kahit sa makipot,mabaho at maduming lugar - SOLVE! Isa pang mga grupo ng tao na nakakainis, yung mgaaktibista, NPA at kung ano-ano pang ideologicalpolitical groups. Sabi nila, mahal na mahal nilaang Pilipinas kaya pinagpalalaban nila ang kanilangmga adhikain.

PUNYETA! EH HINDI RIN KAYO NAGBABAYAD NG TAX! ANGKAKAPAL RIN NG MGA MUKHA NYO! MGA IPOKRITO! MAHAL DAW ANG PILIPINAS AYAW NAMANMAGBAYAD NG BUWIS! BAKIT MAY BIR COLLECTOR BA SA GITNA NG MENDIOLA ATEDSA?! MAY TAX COLLECTION BA SA BUNDOK?! WALA DIN NAMAN KAYONG MGA TRABAHO! KUNG MAY TRABAHOTALAGA KAYO, HINDI KAYO MAG-RA-RALLY DAHIL SAYANGANG SWELDO NYO PAG ABSENT KAYO! PAANO NYO MAIPAPAKITA ANG PAGMAMAHAL NYO SA PILIPINASKUNG WALa NA KAYONG GAWANG MATINO KUNDIMAG-RALLY AT MAMUNDOK??!!! ISA PA YANG MGA MAYAYAMAN AT MGA ARTISTA, NANANGDADAYA AT HINDI NAGBABAYAD NG BUWIS. ANGKAKAPAL NG MUKHA NYO! ANG DAMI NYO NA NGANG PERANANGDADAYA PA KAYO SA TAX!!!! HINDI NYO NAMAN MADADALASA IMPIERNO YANG MGA KAYAMAN NYO. MASUSUNOG LANGDUN YAN. KAYA LALONG BUMABAGSAK ANG NEGOSYO DITO SA PILIPINAS,KASI MGA NEGOSYANTE MANDARAYA. PATISHOWBIZ INDUSTRY, BAGSAK NA DIN. KARMA ANG TAWAGDYAN. MGA BALASUBAS KASI. Sana magkaron ng POLITICAL AND NATIONAL CLEANSING. Alisin (mas maganda kung patayin na lang) ang lahat ngpulitiko at political families sa puwesto. Tibagin ang lahat ng mapanirang organizations at grupo. Itapon sa malayong isla o kayai-pwersa ng hard labor ang mga sobrang tamad na mga Pilipino. Ihiwalay ang mga bata sa kanilang mgatamad at tangang magulang upang makapag-aral sila at maturuan na maging mabuting tao at mamamayan.Magkaron ng bagong lider na walang political ties at utang na loob sa kahit sino. At higit sa lahat, dapat tax payers lang ang pwedeng bumoto! Kung kinakailangang magka-giyera para magtino ang mgaPilipino, ayos lang. Masyado na kasing matigasang ulo ng mga tao dito. Gusto ng kalayaan, pero hindi naman handang panagutan ang responsibilidadng pagiging malaya. Meron daw pinaglalaban naprinsipyo at adhikain pero takot namang mamatay para dito. (Sa mga nakaka-alam sa anime na Gundam Wing, yan anginspirasyon ko sa new Pinas hehe. I love youZechs! I love you Treize!) Hangga’t hindi nagkakaron ng radical change, patuloyna walang kwenta ang Pilipinas at patuloy namagiging tanga ang majority ng mga Pilipino. Sa dami ng nag-mi-migrate na Pilipino sa ibang bansa,dadating ang panahon na minority na lang ngpopulation sa Pilipinas ang may utak. Yung mgamagagaling na Pilipino, malamang maubos na. Sobra nakasi silang na-fru-frustrate at na-de-depresssa mga nakikita nila. Ilang taon pa at aalis na rin ako sa Pilipinas. Wala kong balak na magkaron ng pamilya sa isang bansa na hindi pinapahalagahan ang kontribusyon ng mga taong tunay na bumubuhay dito. Kawawa naman ang magiging anak ko kung dito sya mabubuhay.

Sa totoo lang, broken hearted ako. Minahal ko din angbansang ito. Pilit kong pinagtatanggol kahit bulok.Nakarating na ko ng ibang bansa, pero pinili kongbumalik. Pero ngayon, ayoko na. Suko na ko. Sayanglang ako sa bansang to. Simple lang naman anghiling ko. Gusto ko lang mabuhay ng tahimik atmaayos. Gusto ko na kahit paano eh maipagmalaki ang Pilipinas. Pero wala eh. Doomed to be jologsang bansang to. Alam ko marami pa ang umaasa at naniniwala sapagbabago. Good luck and God bless! Sana tama kayoat mali ako.

the most beautiful piece of writing i've come across in a looooooooooooooooong time! whoever you are, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! about time someone spoke their mind around here. sobrang totoo lahat ng pinagsusulat nya and to those who don't understand tagalog, please let a friend translate it for you. worthwhile read, kahit mahaba.... it's like the author went into my brain and heart and wrote all my thoughts and frustrations and bitterness and anger and sadness and desperation all into this one email. one of the nest forwards in a long while.

"k" marks the spot

so... been so long since i've written in here... well, i barely get enough sleep lately and i've just been so tired from work and now i have to bring my dog to the vet yet again bcoz he's been biting himself on his hind legs and now he's kinda bleeding =( i dunno what it is, but i hope it's just something not serious... gosh

highlight of the month was when i got my tattooÜÜÜ the one thing i've been wanting since high school... the design's kinda complicated: it's someone's symbol but i dunno if she copyrighted it, so if yes, sorry! it just has so many meanings to me and it sums up a lot of who i am... if i get to photograph it, i'll post it hereÜ

so far, saw mr&mrs smith and it was ok. the thing that surprised me the most was how funny it was and how funny brad and angelina were... waiting to see war of the worlds and (this is so 2006) the sentinel (kiefer!!!!) and for those of you not in the know, rent the musical is a movie and will be out this nov, stars rosario dawson and a lot of the original cast from the playÜ can't wait!!!! also for davinci code... i would've liked it if kiefer were in it, but hell! i hope tom doesn't screw this one up!

well, au voir! later.

ang saya!

THIS IS DEFINITELY MY DAY... haha! got a tattoo! fi-fucking-nally!!!Ü i'll put up a picture once i get someone to take it (it's on my back...) hurt like a mother but it was all good... it's my dream to have one since h.s...... and THEN i watched mr. & mrs. smith... so you can only imagine... i haven't had sleep for more than 24 hrs now... uhm... going on 28 hrs w/o any z's... i've done this b4, don't worry;) i also got to shop for clothes and stuff, so the day was productiveÜ

loved the movie... i thought brad and angelina really clicked, no wonder all those "rumors" started... go check it out; it's worth the hype.

only downside? i have to work tom night =(

OH HAPPY DAY!

JUST SAW THE MOST AWESOME MOVIE BY FAR THIS YEAR: STAR WARS 3 - REVENGE OF THE SITH. nuff said. hehe. the most amazing special effects, the most emotionally charged of ALL of the trilogies, and (i may go overboard, but what the hell!) in my opinion, the BEST of them all. i mean, this is THE most anticipated of all movies! the previous two were just the stepping stones if you may, to what the fans and curious ones have been REALLY wanting to see: how sweet anakin became the most feared, powerful (and hated) jedi of all.

from the very beginning, the movie was really buzzing with electricity, non-stop action and one of the classic lines delivered ("i have a bad feeling about this") early on by beloved obi-wan, played so beautifully and masterfully by my crush, ewan mcgregorÜ my fave scene was towards the end when padme said "anakin, you're breaking my heart". i mean, that whole scene at the landing area at the lava or whatever hell place that was. when hayden christensen really displayed his acting chops. i agree with lucas's decision to make the hayden subtlely play the transformation in AOTC; it really worked because we get to see the full impact of being influenced by the dark side. the thing that got to me was that it's the biggest irony: anakin sacrificed himself, really, just so padme could live, but in the end, he was the one who ultimately did what he feared the most. i just love the epicness of it all. i now understand that love played a big part in his reverting to the dark side, it was just twisted because he was really just a lonely, confused guy. i mean, take away all the battle scenes/sfx, and you're left with a REALLY GOOD story, guys! lucas outdid himself on this one, and what a way to go! really loved hayden in this one. i was impressed, just really singing his praises!

as usual, natalie and ewan didn't disappoint. i read in one article that natalie hated that she didn't get to participate in any of the action, but in truth, she saw more "action" in this one than in any of the others. i just loved that she was the vulnerable padme and that her love was greater than anything that she was willing to die for it.(sob!) ewan as obi-wan in this one also outdid himself. the part where he said "you were my brother. i loved you" was just priceless. you really FEEL it. and for a sci-fi movie, that's big.

the music and the familiar tones incorporated from the previous trilogy was just great! as a fan, this did not disappoint at all. and telling the history of how things came to be for the first saga was just beautiful. it all came to place, finally... tied the two trilogies so beautifully and seamlessly. goosebumps all over! perfect 10. a must-see!!!! over and over and over again! i plan to watch it again! WEE!!!

holy crap!

oh my gosh! it's been so long, i almost forgot how to use the fucking internet! for a month or so, the computer's been broken, not able to log into the net and all that shit... really made me angry. anyway, just got regularized last april 22 so that's good news... still trying to make up for lost time because of the friggin' chicken pox.... and now, catching up on all the emails that's been sitting in my mailbox all those weeks.

tomorrow we'll be watching REVENGE OF THE SITH!!!! I CANNOT WAIT!!!! my friend got tickets in eastwood and we're reserved right smackdab in the middle! WOOHOO!!!! i even bought the premiere mag that had hayden on the cover. real cool... when the lights are off, the lightsaber actually glows!

i missed my 24 news and kiefer and music and stuff! oooooohhh! be back probably and hopefully on my next off. cheers

April 11, 2005 12:50am

I’m writing this in word because I can’t seem to open a webpage when connecting to the net… another one of my problems. Well, I had the chicken pox and now it’s going away, slowly, but surely☺ but the doctor said that I can only go back to work if all the scabs or whatever healed up and were gone, otherwise, it’s a risk of passing it on to someone else.

Anyway, I’m just really bored at home, watching TV, (used to) surf the Internet… eat, sleep, take care of my dog --- another topic later. I wish I’d bought the DVD player then! Shit.

And now I know going back to work I wouldn’t have any salary next payday because I didn’t work for 2 friggin’ weeks! I hate this! And I can barely get by with what I have now! Tuff. I’m just so nervous and worried about the certification… I have awful stats! And now this setback of me getting sick! I hate it! I sure hope there’s something good after this…

I can’t even setup or go to my barkada’s meeting. Ina and Gel are leaving for the States and Japan respectively, going back to their lives and we haven’t even seen each other, much less talk! =(

My dog found a freakin’ girlfriend. He rarely comes home now and even fights the other dogs whenever they get near the bitch. I just don’t like it. Yes! I’m jealous. Whatever. I’m just selfish that way…


April 11, 2005 7:23am

The fucking Internet is still not working… so I’ll be typing my thoughts here again… there comes certain times (to me at least) when the brain just starts to run and run and run, like you drank 4 cups of coffee in a row or something…

I finally got bored with watching TV and staying at home… I guess I miss work (weird!) and my officemates and friends and just talking to customers; some of them can be nice☺

Thank God you can’t get chicken pox ever again once you do get it☺☺☺
I MISS THE INTERNET! SHET!

chicken pox

ok... i've accepted it already, though i still can't live with it! damn, these things are fuckin' itchy! anyway, i didn't realize what it was until my friend, jing, told me. then i visited the nurse to get consultation and she sent me home. when i got home, i was semi-ok; kinda nauseous but ok... it was in full bloom then, so when i got back from the doctor, he just signed the sss papers and gave me a medical certificate.

another reason to hate your job/workplace: if they literally make you sick. a warning to those working in confined spaces and particularly airconditioned ones... always ask if they're ventilating the place... whether they're airing out or fumigating the previous week's dirt or not. i did some research regarding chicken pox and turns out that for you to catch it, there's an incubating period of 1-2 days; wherein you'll be coughing a lot or basically already spreading the freakin' virus around and didn't even know it. which was what happened to me. when i talked to the nurse, she said that if ever my case WAS chicken pox, i would be the 4th person to get it in the company. grrrreat.

with all the coughing i did in the past week or so, i may have spread that virus around to a good 5 or 10 people, depending on who hasn't gotten it yet or who's immune system is weak. i couldn't have gotten it anywhere else. know why? i didn't GO anywhere else. my routine is: sleep, wakeup, eat, go to work, go home, sleep. even on my days off i couldn't find the energy to go out and be with friends or even shop by myself or whatever. i usually just rest it off. and it made complete sense that the virus was airborne and that i was stuck there for like 9, sometimes 11 hrs a day for overtimes and stuff.

i'm more upset because not too long ago, i got the mumps too. ha! and i had also been working in the same company. still am. geez! i know they're cost-cutting, but come on! to endanger your employees' lives like that??? i'm just saying, it's not worth it, what i'm doing and what they're paying me... i know i shouldn't, but i've got no one else to talk to about this. i've constantly complained to other people in the office who agree as well but to no avail.... thank God i'm not in any serious health condition or anything... --- that was sarcastic.

when the shit hits the fan

i have chicken pox. fuck.

pope

this is really bothering me. i've been crying nonstop now for the whole day that the news has been covering the pope's condition. i just can't stop crying everytime i see, like file footage of him or something... i'm just so touched by his presence and his being... you can really see how wonderful and kind and nice he is and how loved he is... listening to robbie williams greatest hits to the song "angels". eventhough it's for a girl, the message is strong. there's also this sarah mclachlan song "full of grace" that's also approriate. just offers you solace.... i really don't know what to think or say or feel.

i'm not a devout catholic, i don't hear mass every sunday; i don't observe the rosary month (the last time i did that was in high school or college); i'm just not an active catholic. but i wear a crucifix. i wear my faith right next to my heart because i believe that you don't have to be an "active" catholic to be considered rightful and pure of soul and heart. if you practice what they preach and not just for others' sake, but because you freely want to, that's what i think is the true christian. you don't have to be good because others are present. you do good because that's what's right and that's what you feel like doing. the pope taught me many things. like i said earlier, i made a paper on him back when i was in grade school. the teacher asked us to come up with 3 people we think influenced us the most. i picked mr. & mrs. john kennedy and karol wojtyla. the first two because they forever changed the way we look at america and how they re-defined the intentions and culture of that country so well that until NOW, they're still being talked about and books are still being written about them.

the latter because he was the quiet, loving, caring, forgiving and holy man that he is. i remember writing that he looked like a teddy bear, with his big broad shoulders and his eyes... the kindest eyes you have ever seen. even now as i surf through the news sites and watch cnn and local news about him, i still get teary-eyed, cry even. a person who could evoke so much emotion from others is truly great. i do know one thing for sure: that when the time comes that he has to go and be with his Maker, he will be the guardian angel for all of us, looking in on us and guiding us to the path and way that God wants us to go. hoping for the pope's recovery...

and now i find out johnnie cochran, OJ's former lawyer died of brain tumor. shit. what is happening???

death itself

it's kinda morbid what i'm about to write and what you're about to read... i'm just so bothered with what i call "consecutive death"... it's kinda weird the way it happens. there was diana and mother teresa and then later john kennedy jr. in 1997... aaliyah and sept 11 in 2001 and now the schiavo case and now we have an ailing Pope and the king of monaco both sick and frail and, you have to admit and accept it, near death. i just felt writing it because they can't all be coincidence, that's too weird, for lack of a better word. i'm just worried, especially for the pope, because i wrote a paper on him once and i know that he's the kindest, most awesome person on earth.

ok... speaking of the schiavo case, the more i find out about it, the more i wanna kill the michael schiavo --- i truly wish he's the one lying there dead instead of his wife (whom he apparently refuses to divorce because of insurance money... he has children with another woman). i just can't understand how the US justice system could just let that happen. admittedly, i have no idea how their government works, but i watch the news, i kinda have a brain too and it doesn't take a genius to figure out that the schindlers were cheated, they were robbed of a daughter. it was bad enough that the husband killed his wife, but now they're fighting over how she's going to be buried, if she'll be cremated or not. it's just unbelievable that the asshole can't let go. she's dead, you jerk!!! give her to her family already! i cannot see for the life of me a reason to keep holding on to her just to cremate her. i'm just amazed how much evil there is in the world.

my baby booby... photogenic noh? nag-pose pa! 

first one

blog. blog. blog. who came up with that word anyway? just occured to me to ask... ok. first off, i'm not liking the way the dashboard looks like... i thought it was going to be black... apparently, it was for the freakin' site... no biggie. it's my day off and i'm pissed off and sad and restless and worried and hungry... maybe in that order. at work i took my lunch break during my 15 min break so i screwed up my adherence again! and then while recounting the story, i cried to one of my co-workers who basically laughed at me. and then this weather is so awful! i take a long, cold shower and when i put my clothes on, i'm sweating like a pig already! i guess i should call my site rant huh?

i'm basically surfing the net right now... trying to find this video about prue (yes, halliwell) when she died... the one with "calling all angels" playing in the background... real touching tribute.... and yeah listening to my music compilation... i'll put up my list one day.... that'll explain a lot about me... for now, hopefully this is ok for a first-timer hereÜ